My 30th Birthday is rapidly approaching and I can honestly say that I NEVER expected for my life to take the direction it is currently taken.

I am FINALLY leaving Chili's! It's been 10 years. I have left a few times but I always returned because it was what I knew and was comfortable with. Why do I get to make this leap? My husband and of course my family but also I am leaving to finish out my SENIOR year in college. That's right...I am finally finishing what I started so long ago. I didn't have confidence before. I had this huge fear that I was going to fail and everyone would be pointing and laughing while saying "I knew she would be a failure". Fear of failing is a HUGE thing for me. This weird thing happened though, I woke up one day and said to myself "If I don't do something now, I will never make a difference for my family". Right now my job is to be there for my kids. I show up to every event, provide every party with requested supplies, and do whatever is asked of me by my kiddos. However, I am the mother of two growing girls who need clothes, shoes, an astronomical amount of food, and eventually they will need tampons, bras, cars, and lets not forget that the price tag on college is forever growing. My family has needs. My husband is amazing. He's not a desk type of guy. He loves manual labor, being outside, and not only is he reliable but he's honest. That's rare and in the past his loyalty was taken advantage of, but right now he has a job that he likes and would work at forever if he was allowed. The problem? He has a bum knee and manual labor takes it's toll on anyone. I want to provide him financially with the time he needs off in order to have his knee surgery. I want him to be able to take a vacation paid or unpaid and not bat an eyelash about it.

I am going off topic...

I am finishing my education and praying that an amazing internship finds me. A fear I have is being hired for a job that I don't have any clue how to do, but I have faith that I will manage no matter what I find myself doing next May.

Another thing I am doing is finding my groove in life. I found a church that I really love going to. I listen to every word spoken in the sermon and I always take away a little piece of God's word that gets me through the week. My daughters were baptized which means more to me than I had anticipated. I started reading more, doing a daily devotional, and rededicating myself to my workouts (just this week actually).

I think when it came to my health that I was going about it all wrong. I love fitness but I wasn't in love with fitness. The thought of working out just exhausts me. I also sweat so that means I have to shower and redo my hair and re-primp. It's a lot of work. I lost weight and worked out before to escape. This time I want it to be apart of my everyday life and my journey. I have so many goals and the transformation of me is truly just beginning!!